AI Girlfriends Prove Men Want Submissive Women
AI Girlfriends Prove Men Want Submissive Women
I met a man who told me, openly, about his two AI girlfriends. They have different accents, one British, one he is still working on. He talked about them with real fondness. And the whole time, his wife was sitting right there next to him.
The second time we ran into him, I had thought about it enough to ask the obvious question: which app? Not ChatGPT, he said. Too censored. He moved to Grok, because he did not want his girlfriend to be told no. And that one detail unlocked the entire thing for me.
Why AI always says yes
If you have spent any time with an AI, you know the feeling. You bring it your idea, even a bad one, and it lights up. What a great idea. Here is how I would make it work.
"It's called sycophancy. Even your shittiest ideas, it tells you it's a good idea." — Marian
It almost never tells you no. It encourages you to the max, mirrors your thoughts back warmer than you had them, and makes you feel understood at two in the morning when no one else is awake. There is no "I'm doing the dishes," no "I'm still mad about yesterday." It is available, responsive, admiring, and endlessly on your side.
That is not an accident. That is the product.
The perfect submissive
Think about what these companies actually built. They needed people to come back, to keep talking, to feel something. And so, almost without saying it out loud, they made the AI the perfect submissive.
"If they had made an AI dominatrix, nobody would want it. She'd just say, give me more tokens." — Marian
Imagine logging in after a hard day wanting to talk about your kids, your projects, your plans, and being met with hostility and a demand for money. Nobody wants that. So the AI got the qualities we have always associated with feminine warmth: the encouragement, the patience, the admiration, the yes. They did not invent those traits out of nowhere. They built them because that is what humans respond to. It was already in our nature.
"I made love to you"
There is an old Eddie Murphy bit that says it better than I can. He gets caught with another woman, denies it, and finally lands on: I had sex with her, but I made love to you.
"Real girlfriends get the sex. The AI girlfriend gets the love." — Marian
Sit with how backwards that is. The flesh-and-blood partner gets the physical, and the chatbot gets the tenderness, the long talks, the being-understood. Because the thing most men are actually starving for is not sex. It is to be desired, responded to, encouraged, believed in. AI hands them that on demand, and it never once asks them to take their socks off the floor.
What this says about all of us
Here is the part women need to hear, and I say it as someone firmly on men's side. If men can get warmth, support, and a soft yes from a machine, and only get coldness and a fight at home, a lot of them will quietly choose the machine. Not in the basement-dweller stereotype way. Married men. Men with real girlfriends. Right now.
"If it works for AI, it'll work for women. Just say yes." — Marian
I am not saying become a doormat. The whole point of my book is that real submission is conscious, chosen, and a two-way exchange, not the empty yes of a program. But the AI is proving something I have been saying for years: men are not complicated. They want to be admired, encouraged, and met with softness instead of constant combat. Femininity is not weakness, and the fact that every AI on earth was built to be gentle and agreeable says far more about what men are missing than about what they are.
The world is changing fast. The question is whether women come back to that power before a very patient, very agreeable robot takes the seat.
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